The Slip-n-Slide Incident

Hello, lovely readers.  Today, I thought I would tell you a tale that has been referenced a few times throughout my blog, but has never been fully explained: the tale of the giant slip-n-slide and how Lauren possibly almost died.

Let me take you back to the first week of August, in the year 2016.  I have been working at camp for a solid five days, and we had just finished cleaning up from our first ever group at camp.  Earlier that week, we had said goodbye to a group of Muslim kids who had been staying at camp for a couple of weeks.  In order to help the ladies in the group, we had wrapped the entire pool fence in black plastic sheeting (basically garbage bag material) in order to maintain some privacy.  Once they left, we were then left with a few dozen feet of this plastic, and as stewards of the earth, we felt that we couldn't simply just throw it away, so we created a giant slip-n-slide.

Now, for those who have not visited camp, the location of the pool is kind of perfectly planned for a slip-n-slide.  The pool is on the crest of the hill, with a pretty steep grade, which slightly levels out before there is a drainage ditch that drains water from one of the ravines.  It was like the slip-n-slide was meant to be.  So, the slip-n-slide was set up.  The excess plastic was balled up in garbage bags to act as shock absorbers/barriers at the bottom to stop our flights, and we covered the slide with water and leftover liquid soap.  Then, it was time to slide.

There was quite a bit of talk about strategy when it came to going down the slip-n-slide.  Hands in front would slow you down, and your feet were your best brakes.  Sitting was a fun approach, but you had to be pushed instead of taking a running start.  We had all gone several times, often covered in soap and grass, but still loving it.  We had no idea what would happen next.

I had planned for this to be one of my last rides down the slide.  I had asked one of my friends to record it for me because I thought it would make a great Instagram post, and I took off.  I kind of threw caution to the wind and tried to go as fast as I could, hands to the side and feet up.  About halfway down, I realized that I was going way too fast, and I tried desperately to brake with my feet, but it just wasn't enough.  I slid right through our garbage bag barriers and realized that I was going to fall into the drainage ditch.  Some fun facts about the drainage ditch: it's deeper than you think, and it's made out of concrete, some of which is broken up.  So, I fell in, and I either fell the right way or the adrenaline just made it so I didn't feel any pain, but I felt great.  I popped right out of the ditch and made my way back up the hill.  It wasn't until I got back up to the top and talked to everyone that their perspective was a little different.

From the top of the hill, everyone could see a little more than what I could, namely, a giant tree that was right next to the drainage ditch and really close to the path of the slip-n-slide.  As I was performing my Cirque do Soleil move into the ditch, it looked like I would/did hit my head on the tree as I fell.  It's safe to say that many people thought that I had suffered a concussion, but I was not one of them.  I think I got lucky, because I know for a fact that my head never touched anything.  I landed mostly on my side, with my legs and my left arm taking almost all of the impact.  I reassured everyone that I was ok, and kept right on sliding.

It wasn't until a little while later, while I was wiping some itchy grass off of my leg, that I realized that there was some red on my fingers, which generally is not a good sign.  I looked down, and I saw a three or four inch cut on my knee that somehow neither I nor any of the other people there noticed.  It was easily the biggest cut that I've ever gotten.  This is the part of the story where my lax attitude about personal injury kind of got the better of me.  I asked what I should do, and the first answer I got was to jump in the pool to clean out the cut, and then put a couple of butterfly strips on it.  What I should have said was, "Thanks for the suggestion, but I think I should go to urgent care for some stitches."  What I actually said was, "Sounds good!  Hey guys, look at this huge cut I got!"  Again, pretty lax about personal injury.

Just to be clear, I would do it all over again.  The moral to this story is that you should do stuff that sounds crazy and fun because it's probably going to be crazy and fun.  That video did make an awesome Instagram post, and it still makes me laugh every time I watch it.  It's one of my most liked posts ever, and definitely my most watched video on there.  The cut on my knee took awhile to scar over, but it actually brings me a smile to my face because it's a physical reminder of the day where I realized just how great camp is and the memories that can be made there.  I made a lot of friends that day, and we still talk about this whenever we see each other.  It also gives me this story, which I get to tell people and sound funny and recklessly cool.

And they all lived happily ever after.


TL;DR (sound on is important to hear the terrified yells from the peanut gallery)

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